Hidden River Secrets (Hidden River Academy Book 2) Page 14

  The rope hand-guides bit into my skin as I wrapped my hands around them, taking my first, shaking step onto the bridge. It was a single rope for my feet, one step in front of the other, and the forest opened up around me. I was surrounded by greenery, trees everywhere, a single jagged streak of blue-sky above me. The shadows cooled me even as a nervous sweat broke out across the back of my neck again.

  I. Was. So. Far. Up. If I let go, if I just slipped to the side, the world would come rushing up to meet me. I could already feel it, the pain of hitting the ground. I had a flash of memory, of the world twisting, the stairs of the auditorium slipping away under me when I’d been pushed.

  Behind me, Cael made an annoyed noise under his breath.

  “You going to fucking move, or what, Food Stamps?”

  A flash of anger filled me at the insult and I turned my head to glare at him. His eyes were narrowed too, and that made me even madder. Like, how dare he get angry at me when he’d been the one to call me a derogatory name?

  I opened my mouth to tell him off, taking a step at the same time. I stepped down on open air, tumbling forward, and my cursing him out morphed into a scream. The world went sideways, my hand slipped off one of the guide ropes, and I fell. In that moment I forgot all about my harness, or the safety line clipped up above me to stop me from dying. All I felt was panic, white-cold flares of shock radiating through my body.

  Something hit my stomach hard, wrapping around me from behind and my fall stopped with a jerk. I choked out a breath, and the sensation of going weightless filled me as I was pulled up and backward.

  “Got you,” Cael said into my ear; I thudded against his check and he hauled me off the ropes, and back onto the platform. “I got you.”

  I stood there for a second, and then my legs gave out from under me. He went down with me as I crumpled, my ass hitting the wood hard. I stared over the edge, my breaths coming fast and harsh in my throat.

  “You’re fine,” he said, his arm still wrapped around my belly. I looked up at him, my muscles like melting wax, refusing to answer me wen I tried to shift my weight.

  “I can’t move,” I said, the honest truth. Was he asking me to move? I wasn’t fine. I’d nearly fallen.

  “Take a second,” he said, un-clipping my safety line as it was tight and tugging on my harness. “Breathe, okay? Can you count with me? In… two… three…” He rubbed his hands together for a few seconds and then pressed them to my cheeks. I closed my eyes at the warm skin-on-skin contact and breathed to his count. He was so close I could smell the faint, spicy hint of aftershave on him. I tried to breathe through my mouth, because the scent was warm, and it made my skin prickle for some reason.

  The wood platform shook, and a grunt behind me let me know someone else had joined us.

  “Is she alright?” A female voice. The camp counselor.

  “Don’t turn your head,” Cael said, an odd gentleness in his tone. “Just stay looking at me. You’re on the solid platform. You’re not going to fall.”

  “I’ve never been afraid of heights,” I insisted, opening my eyes to look steadily into his own. The female counselor knelt down next to me.

  “You alright, sweetheart?”

  “She just slipped, that’s all,” Cael said. “We checked the ropes this morning and they were fine. It was just a misstep, not a problem with the gear.” He kept staring at me, searching my eyes for… something. I swallowed and looked away after another few moments. My thoughts were all jumbled, like the fall had startled my brain and mixed everything up. Why did Cael look so… worried? We hated each other.

  “I’m okay,” I said. My breathing was calming down, and my heart had stopped galloping so hard in my chest.

  “The guys are worried,” the counselor said. “Cael, why don’t you go down and tell them she’s alright.” She turned back to me as Cael go to his feet. “Do you want to go down too?” She asked me as Cael disappeared over the edge, the rope ladder creaking under him as he went. “You don’t need to do the course if you don’t want to.”

  I glanced out past the edge of the platform. I bit my lip.

  “I’m fine. Can you check my gear, though? And hook me back up?” I could totally do it. One fall wasn’t going to stop me. I wanted to prove to everyone that I was tougher than they thought I was.

  “Are you worried about it? Is it too tight?” She asked, running her fingers over my harness again.

  “No… just double checking, I guess.” I got to my feet, wobbling for a second, and grabbed onto one of the guard-rails that surrounded either side of the platform. The counselor pulled down the safety line and re-hooked it to my harness.

  “This looks fine too. I think you’re good to go unless you want to go back down. Nobody would blame you,” she said with kindness. I inhaled, the crisp, pine-scented air cleaning the back of my throat, and I let all the stress go as I exhaled.

  “No… no, I’ll be okay.” I eyed the rope bridge. “I’m not going to let this stop me.”

  “Well tell me if you need a hand, okay? And keep your eye on the ropes. You ready?”

  “Yeah,” I said, stepping up to the edge of the platform. Nothing was going to hold me back, not even nearly falling off a rope-bridge. Not Cael, or Paige, or Reid, or the complicated way I needed to find my place between Shawn and Buck. It was like the rope bridge was a shitty metaphor for my current existence, and getting across it was one small way of me proving I had what it took to survive at Hidden River.

  I took one step, the rope giving under my weight slightly, then another. My breathing was loud in my ears, as the bridge swayed with my movements, the ropes in my hands rough on my palms.

  A sudden cheer from down below startled me and I froze, looking for the source of the sound. A bunch of students stood at the bottom; Buck looked up at me, hand shading his eyes, and Shawn stood with his hands above his head, clapping hard. A rush of something, warmth, acceptance, whipped through me and I had to bite back a smile before focusing back on the ropes.

  I could do this. One small step at a time.

  The campfire was hot on my face, the flames licking up to the dark, night sky. I sat between Shawn and Buck, wrapped up in Buck’s over-large sweatshirt that came over my hands. My legs were bare, but with the raging heat of the fire in front of us, my skin was toasty-warm. I sighed, relaxing down between my guys. The rest of the day had spilled out in front of us, sun-soaked and wonderful. There was something about the open-air, maybe the forests all around us even, that made everyone less tense, and a little more friendly. There’d been a crowd waiting for me at the other end of the rope bridge course, and Shiv had been the first one to throw her arm around me and hug me tight in relief that I’d made it. Never mind that I’d never really been in danger, it was nice to have everyone smile at me, acting like they were proud of me for finishing it off.

  Like they cared about me.

  So weird.

  Nice, but weird.

  Dinner had been beans and hotdogs (normal fare for me, and it was nice to see some of my classmates dig into the food like it wasn’t just for peasants), and then down to the campfire pit for more marshmallows.

  I was really enjoying the heck out of s’mores. Really, if it wasn’t something I replicated at home with Uncle Matt, then what was the point of even living?

  With a sigh that sounded content, Shawn turned his head to kiss the top of mine.

  “You warm enough, short stuff?” He asked, his arm working it’s way into the back of my sweatshirt from the bottom. He palmed my spine, rubbing there slowly. I let my eyes drift close, the sound of chatter all around us not seeming to permeate the little bubble we were in.

  “Mmmhmm,” I said, leaning into the touch. Buck, my other steadfast bookend, shifted closer to me, his warmth radiating out from his bare arms and hands as he brushed one finger along the side of my thigh.

  “We’ll walk you back to your cabin tonight, make sure you get in safe,” he said. I cracked an eye at him. There was misch
ief written on his face.

  “Why do I think you have ulterior motives for walking me back?” I asked. He gave me an innocent smile, spreading his hands in the air like he had no idea what I was talking about.

  “I think that sounds like a great idea,” Shawn added. “There’s bears in the dark. And idiots. Lots of idiots. Half our camp-site is filled with idiots.”

  “Less talk about idiots, more talk about who’s gonna pass me some s’mores,” I said, looking around for a close bag of marshmallows. “Hey, Dana, care to share?”

  The blonde girl holding the marshmallows turned to look at me, and then grinned, passing them over to me.

  “I’ll find cookies,” Shawn said as Buck rooted around in the bag at his feet, pulling out more chocolate. My stomach rumbled.

  “Don’t you ever get full?” Buck asked, eyeing my stomach with a sorta-grossed out, sorta-admiring expression.

  “I could say the same about you, how many times did you eat up all the leftovers?” I said without thinking, and then internally winced when his smile tugged down at the corners. He glanced away. We didn’t talk much about him being asked to leave our house. “Hey, sorry,” I murmured, slipping my hand into his. He gave me a gentle squeeze and then turned back to me, lifting his other hand to run his fingers through my hair.

  “Nothing to apologize for,” he said, his voice as soft as his touch. In the darkness, he was like a fire-kissed young dark god, his hair loose and almost down to his shoulders.

  “You gotta cut this,” I whispered, tugging on one lock. It was starting to curl a bit at the ends, his hair so thick I was almost jealous. “I’m going to braid it and put flowers in it when you’re not looking.”

  He laughed, the sound short and clipped.

  “Don’t you fucking dare,” he said, leaning in close. My breath caught and he kissed me, pulling me into him. My hands pressed against his chest.

  A clearing throat had us yanking apart.

  “Mr. Barron, Miss Quinn, that’s not appropriate for camp. Please keep that kind of behavior for when you get home under your respective guardians’ eyes,” a teacher I didn’t know personally, but had seen around the school, said. She was tall, lanky, and had her hair pulled back into a thin, dark braid. She eyed us both. “Do I need to separate you?”

  “Sorry Mrs. Williamson,” Buck said immediately. “It’s my fault.”

  “Mmhmm,” she said, moving away. “Don’t do it again.” I watched as she walked the perimeter of the camp-fire. We weren’t the only couple at camp, and there were a few patches of students nervously giggling when she got to them. I saw someone staring at me, and I realized it was Paige. She was snuggled up to Cael, her hand on his thigh, not even caring that a teacher was making the rounds to stop any inappropriate after-dark behavior. She probably thought she was untouchable. I resisted the urge to make a face at her, and instead turned to Buck.

  “She’s the university coordinator,” Buck said when the teacher was on the other side of the fire from us. “You won’t get to talk to her until it’s time to apply for universities.”

  I’d just pissed off the person who was supposed to be helping me get into school after I graduated.

  “Ugh,” I said, “now I’m regretting my life choices.”

  “Hey look, I got like, every box of graham crackers,” Shawn said, returning to us out of the shadows.

  “She’ll get over it,” Buck assured me, before grinning up at Shawn. “Awesome, pass them. I need something sweet.”

  “You have something sweet right next to you,” Shawn said and I rolled my eyes.

  “You sound like a creepy old man. Those lines don’t work on me.”

  “Can’t blame a guy for trying,” Shawn said, and I pushed him with a laugh, when he sat down. He filched chocolate from Buck and I speared some marshmallows for toasting. The fire crackled, the sparks flying into the air above us, and for a few minutes at least, it felt like time stopped still and we were invincible.

  Later, fire-warmed and stumbling through the darkness, a flashlight as the only source to keep us from wandering in the wrong direction, Shawn kept me close. His arm was tight around my shoulders, Buck hovering a few feet in front of us as we walked to my cabin first.

  “This is nice,” Buck said, not looking back, his hand reaching out. I grabbed it in mine, to keep us connected. It felt like I always needed to be touching both of them, to stay grounded to them. Maybe it was because I felt like any second this could be taken away from me, that they would be ripped away from me into the darkness and I would be left alone again.

  “Tripping over tree roots is nice?” Shawn grumbled as he stumbled. I laughed in the dark, the noise seeming muffled by the woods around us.

  “Nah, I mean, being just the three of us, without the pressure of school. Sure, half the other students are here, but it doesn’t feel like they’re all watching us all the time anymore,” Buck said as his flashlight splashed across the side of my cabin. Each cabin was painted a different color of the rainbow; mine was a bright, acid-green that had faded a bit in the sunlight and the hard winters.

  “This is my stop,” I said.

  “Is it though?” Shawn asked, and like they’d planned it, he turned to me, pulling me in for a hard, sweeping kiss. I moaned, kissing him back, my arms wrapping around his neck so I could lift up closer to him, my hips settling against his.

  “Make that noise again,” Buck’s voice whispered over the side of my neck. He was behind me, his hands going to my waist. His fingers slipped up under my clothes, to wrap around my front, splaying on my stomach.

  I was breathless when I pulled away from Shawn, to lean back into Buck’s arms.

  “Someone’s gonna-” My words died in my throat when Buck’s hands slid up, cupping my breasts through my bra.

  “Nobody’s gonna know if you’re quiet,” Shawn assured me with the confidence of someone who didn’t have a target painted on his back and half of the school’s female population seeming to be out to get him. I looked up at him, the energy that was burning down in between my thighs warring with my good sense, and I shook my head hard.

  “No,” I said, “seriously, we’ll get in trouble and I don’t want to be sent home.” Buck’s hands stayed on my breasts for a moment before he groaned and pulled away.

  “I hate when you’re right,” he said, dropping a kiss on my lips, briefly. Shawn sighed too, stealing another kiss from me.

  “If you’re sure,” Shawn said and I poked him in the belly.

  “No means no,” I teased. He grumbled and kissed me once more, his hands lingering on my hips, like he wanted to pull me against him all over again.

  “Goodnight,” Buck whispered as I left them in the dark with a wave, climbing the steps into my cabin. My nerves were still tingling and I had to press my fingers to my mouth to stop the burning. It’d been a long day, and being responsible was the hardest thing in the world. I still didn’t feel safe enough to relax my guard, especially with people like Cael and Reid around. They seemed like they were just looking for extra excuses to hate me or humiliate me, and I wasn’t going to give anyone a reason to tear me away from my guys. They were all I had.

  Nineteen

  Swimming in a glacier-fed lake was officially the worst thing I’d ever experienced in my life (of the water variety), and I spent most of the next day by the fire, making up friendship bracelets and trying to get warmed up. Cael hadn’t been lying about the lake being bone-numbingly cold and generally awful. At least he was an honest jerk.

  Thankfully it seemed like the school expected us to just ‘participate’ in camp events in the loosest sense of the words. Most events were self-directed, and there was always an arts and crafts station set up by the fire, for anyone who wasn’t interested in tramping through the forest or freezing their genitalia off in the lake.

  The loose, lazy feeling that had fallen over all of us spread out and thickened throughout the day, until I felt like a completely different person. I was even sor
ta making friends with students I’d never talked to and only exchanged weird looks in the halls of Hidden River.

  The only people I avoided were Reid, Paige, and Cael, because no-amount of campfire songs and half-burnt marshmallows would ever change how I felt about them. Even if Cael had helped me the other day on the rope course, that didn’t fix the things he’d said about me or done to hurt me, in the past.

  “Here,” Buck said, wrapping a hand around my wrist. I blinked at him and let him take my arm. Between his free fingers, a thin, long friendship bracelet dangled, it’s three-way colors in blue, green, and purple. “I made this for you.” He looped it around my wrist several times before tying it off. I looked down at it as it snuggled on my arm and smiled. Little things like that made what we had seem more real.

  “So gay,” Colt said from across the fire, even as he was in the middle of braiding his own friendship bracelet in the appropriate colors of black and black to match his general outlook on life. I glanced skyward.

  “Witty,” I said, running my fingers along the soft, silken thread. It wasn’t fancy, but it was sweet. I kissed Buck on the cheek, doing a quick check for teachers in the vicinity first. He beamed at me, and made my whole body feel warm in response. “You’re sweet,” I said.

  “Not like you are,” he replied.

  “Going swimming, Barron?” Reid piped up from across the fire near Colt. Reid was working on whittling a stick into a sharper, smaller stick. Everybody needed a hobby, I guess. “It’s a real shrinker today, just warning you in advance.”

  “Yeah, I’m not exactly worried about that,” Buck said, stretching his legs out in front of him, and leaning back on the log bench, spanning the distance between our bench and the one behind us. He shot Reid a challenging look, that pretty much screamed come at me bro.

  “You wouldn’t want to disappoint Mia, but then she probably won’t feel the difference anyway,” Reid said, laughing to himself.