Phoenixfire: A paranormal reverse harem romance (The Rogue Witch Book 8) Page 13

  Cash chuffed a laugh into my thigh, kissing down to my knee, his tongue laving my skin in long, slow flicks. He was in no hurry, so I took slow, uneven breaths, trying to keep still. I knew that the more I asked for it with my body, the longer he’d take to get back to giving me exactly what I wanted.

  Patience. It required so much patience. Eli wasn’t helping, what with the dirty, filthy looks he was giving me. He had a smug grin on his lips. He knew how desperate I was, how Cash was revving me up with his mouth and his fingers, the light touches too little to do anything except frustrate me and make me want to cry out.

  Eli let his hand wander across my hip, fingers walking over my skin, until he grabbed the back of Cash’s head, fisting his hair.

  “C’mon, asshole,” he said in a low voice not meant for me, guiding Cash back up. Cash’s lips pressed slow kisses into the soft inner joint of my thigh, before ghosting across my pussy.

  My breath caught in my throat, and I bit my lip, willing him to finally, finally-

  “Fuck,” the curse escaped me as Cash’s tongue slid up around my clit, laving me with soft flicks that had me arching my feet and digging my toes into the mattress.

  “Bet you come in a minute flat,” Eli’s voice was right in my ear, thrumming in my blood, making the pleasure more intense, hotter and explosive. Eli let his hand rest on the bottom curve of my belly, pressing down.

  I gasped, eyes closing tight, as his touch somehow made what Cash was doing something more in a way I couldn’t explain. The trembling feeling of the edge rushed up on me until all my muscles contracted, and the orgasm snapped up my spine in a pulsing shiver that didn’t seem to end.

  Cool air fanned over my wet skin as Cash pulled away. Eli slipped over me in an instant. His cock was hard against me as he slid inside, stretching me open. Cash collapsed on the bed, his hand finding mine, our fingers lacing together. Through me, the pack strengthened; through them, I found myself.

  My gaze flicked to Eli. He was smiling, his lips quirked even as his eyes were intense and locked on me.

  “What?” I breathed the word. His mouth twisted and he kissed me.

  “I was right,” he said. “You came in a minute flat.”

  A blush exploded across my cheeks, and I whimpered, turning my head to the side as his thrusts grew steady and deep. I wasn’t sure I could come again so soon—my body oversensitive and trembling—but he was unrelenting. Cash held onto me as Eli fucked me with intense enthusiasm.

  Cash kissed my cheek, his breathing steady and soft against the side of my face.

  “You’re so fucking beautiful,” he said. Those words, uttered in such a loving, heart-achingly needy tone, sent me over the edge as Eli held onto my hips and growled out a stuttered version of my name.

  My breathing was labored, sandwiched between Eli’s body from on top, and Cash’s warm length of muscle on the side. Still, being so close to them, I felt like I was the one inside of them. It was exactly what my fractured heart needed to pick itself up and move on from the sadness festering away inside of me.

  As Eli shifted off of me, I relaxed between the guys and stared at the ceiling of the bus. The air was filled with the muted sounds of our breathing. Cash still had my hand, and I reached out for Eli with the other.

  Things would be okay. I was battered and emotionally bruised, but I would be okay.

  I let my eyes close and started to drift.

  A pulse at my throat stopped me from going too far into dreamland. I lifted my fingers to the crystal that bound our pack together and ran my nail along the smooth surface.

  The thought hit me like a freight train, a panicked explosion of noise inside my head.

  We’d had the heartstone for enough time now for it to slowly work its magic. The guys were stronger. We’d seen that in the fight tonight.

  My mouth went dry. I squirmed my thighs together, feeling the wetness that Eli had left there.

  What if that meant they weren’t shooting blanks anymore? How had I not thought about it before? What the hell was wrong with me?

  I lay in the darkness, and quietly panicked.

  16

  Darcy

  “Thank you, thank you, thank you,” I muttered to Chelsea a few days later, as she passed me the pregnancy test.

  “You know, it’s not going to work for at least a week after you have sex, more like two weeks,” she said with a smile, crossing her arms over her chest as she leaned against the wall of her dressing room.

  “I know,” I said, “but I just want to have it… in case.”

  In case I missed my period. In case the worst thing happened. My eyes watered, and Chelsea’s face scrunched up, her lips tugging down at the corners.

  “Don’t cry,” she said, wrapping me up in a hug. She was so petite that I almost had to bend to meet her. “Why are you crying?”

  “Because it’s not the right time, or even something I’m wanting to do, at all. Ever,” I said, sniffling into her shoulder. I knew the guys wanted kids. It’d come up several times in awkward conversation, but how the hell was I supposed to have a child when I still felt like one myself? On top of all the other chaos and danger we were facing?

  Chelsea patted me on the back and pulled tissues out of the box on her vanity counter-top.

  “Well, you’re probably not pregnant. You have, what, a twenty-five percent chance of that happening? It’s not like the guys have super sperm that can magically make you ovulate. They’re not dragons.”

  “What?” I stared at her. She cleared her throat, biting her lip to hide a smile.

  “Just be grateful they’re not dragons.”

  “Fuck,” I muttered. “What about unicorns?”

  She tossed her hair over her shoulder, combing her fingers through the silvery-blond strands.

  “We choose when we’re in season. It’s very convenient.”

  “Lucky,” I commented. She nodded in agreement.

  “I hate condoms, so, yeah, it is lucky, and birth control doesn’t work on unicorns, either, so.” She shrugged her shoulders. “But back to the matter at hand, don’t pee on that for at least another week. Promise me? Because I don’t want you to get a false negative, think that everything is fine, and then have a huge panic attack-”

  “I wouldn’t,” I said, slightly offended she thought that I, of all people, would have a meltdown. She raised one perfectly plucked eyebrow at me. I blushed. “Okay, maybe I would.”

  “Not exactly doing great in the areas of self-control and patience, are you?” She gave me a pointed look.

  “Hey, I’m getting way better at not electrocuting everything,” I pointed out. “I haven’t sparked up in… it feels like forever.” It wasn’t forever, but still. Knowing that I was going longer between electric episodes was something that made me feel better about myself.

  I hoped when I saw Wolfe again that he’d be proud of me.

  A knock at the dressing room door made us both jump.

  “Hey, good lookin’,” Finn said, poking his head inside. I didn’t have to ask how he knew I was there. The guys’ sense of smell was starting to really pick up, so much so that Ace had tracked me through a hotel the day before.

  “Heyyyyy,” I said, dragging the word out like it was a lifeline. I casually pushed my hands behind my back as I slipped the pregnancy test box into my back pocket. Hopefully, he wouldn’t notice. I felt painfully shy about it for some reason. Maybe because it was a touchy subject between us?

  “We’re just having girl time,” Chelsea said, always jumping to my rescue. “Give us a minute?” She fluttered her eyelashes sweetly. Finn glanced back and forth between us.

  “Everything alright?”

  “It’ll stay alright, unless you don’t give us a minute or two,” she said, promising sweet candy-coated death with her eyes.

  “Bossy horse,” he muttered and ducked back out of the room. The door clicked shut behind him.

  “Give it to me,” she said, holding out her hand. “You are laugha
bly bad at subterfuge. I’ll keep ahold of it for a few days. Tell me again how you managed to get your shit together long enough to apply to a mundane college halfway across the country and move out of your ancestral home?”

  “I was really motivated,” I said, passing back the pregnancy test with a sigh. “But right now, it feels like my brain is foggy and being yanked in a bunch of different directions. I can hardly think straight.”

  Chelsea gave me a sympathetic look, taking my hands in hers to give them a squeeze.

  “I think that’s pretty fair, given all that’s gone on. How’s this feeling?” She tapped the slight bump on the neckline of my shirt, where the heartstone lay underneath, pulsing warmly against my skin.

  “It makes me hope the guys get a chance to shift soon, if they even can yet,” I said, thumbing the small lump. It was a comforting habit, to touch it and reassure myself it still was there.

  I needed to find a more secure way of carrying it around. A necklace was something too easy to drop, or lose. What if the chain snapped? Especially in a fight? The thought made me shiver. I didn’t think I had it in me to make a second heartstone, and even if I did… was it even possible? I needed to figure out some way of surgically attaching it to my body.

  I made a face; Chelsea tilted her head.

  “What’s wrong, princess?” she asked with a knowing smile.

  “Just thinking way too much and not achieving anything,” I said with a sigh. I ran my fingers through my curls, the strands starting to lose the vibrant teal color I’d dyed them. I needed to refresh that soon, or I’d start to look like a bog witch, which would fuel even more rumors on social media and in the tabloids. I frowned, my forehead creasing. “Is it safe to dye your hair when you’re pregnant?” I asked. Chelsea paused from touching up her makeup in the mirror, the red lipstick in her hand bright and vibrant.

  “I don’t know,” she said. “I’ve never tried it.”

  “Never tried dying your hair, or being pregnant?” I asked.

  “Being pregnant.”

  “Who’s being pregnant?” Craig’s voice was rough as he opened the door to the dressing room, and we both jerked in surprise. I glared at him. At least he wasn’t one of my guys. That would have been a much more awkward conversation.

  “Nobody that I know of,” Chelsea said, like she hadn’t procured me a pregnancy test earlier. She gave him a brilliant smile. “How’s everyone’s favorite turncoat?”

  “I’m not-” He huffed out an annoyed noise. “Whatever. Are you girls okay? The guys are looking for you, Darce,” he said. He’d been hovering around me the last few nights, my unofficial shadow when Dean and Seth were busy working the shows and the guys were on stage. There was sort of an uneasy truce going on. It helped that Craig did regular pacing, stalking patrols of the venues every night, and no more hunters, real or compelled, had shown their faces. I wasn’t sure if that was because of the lesson we’d taught them—if the message had been received loud and clear—or if there just weren’t any more of them coming… for now.

  But Craig was earning his keep, and I thought the pack appreciated having him around, somewhat. He kept an eye on things, and Chelsea seemed to trust him well enough.

  Which had to be good enough for the rest of us. I knew he was missing Max worse than even I was, which also convinced me he was telling the truth, even if we hadn’t yet gotten the whole story of who he was and how he’d stumbled into our world.

  “I’d better go see them,” I said to Chels before turning to Craig. “Where are they?”

  “Hanging around the merch booth, flirting,” he said, looking annoyed.

  “They’re not flirting,” I shot back I didn’t have an inch of doubt. “They’re networking. Being good to the merch people and the super-VIP fangirls.” Today we had let in some fans on early-access passes. Not quite a meet-’n’-greet, but it sounded like the guys had turned it into one. I really needed to tell them to stop making those changes without talking to me about it first. Then I’d at least be prepared for whatever got thrown at me.

  “Whatever, looks like flirting to me. You coming?” Craig hitched his shoulder. Chelsea patted me on the arm.

  “Go with Sir Surly here,” she said, “I’m gonna finish getting ready and I’ll meet you in a bit. I want to look perfect for stage.” Chelsea was going to get up with Finn later that night and sing a duet with him. It was a way for me to get more comfortable with the idea of going on stage, since our original plan had been stymied by a bunch of zombie hunters. I still wasn’t sold on it, so Chelsea hoped her being there for a few nights in a row would let me come out with her at some point, when I felt I could handle it.

  I didn’t know how to tell her I would never be comfortable under the spotlight. It just wasn’t for me.

  I trotted to keep up with Craig, who was a few paces ahead of me.

  “How’s it going?” I asked.

  “Your pack is interesting,” he said, and I saw his throat tighten. “They tolerate me, which is the most I can ask for.”

  “Well, you really do need to explain… a lot.” I inhaled, slowly and thoughtfully. “You’ve never really told us the whole story about Max.”

  “Max was something special from the beginning, and I knew that. She got unlucky. Her dad was…” Craig took a deep breath and looked skyward. “He wasn’t what he seemed to be. Nothing about Max was what it seemed, ever.”

  “So you knew about her from the very start? You guys met in school though. You were what, twelve?” I couldn’t help the desire to pepper him with endless questions. He was my last link to Max, and it felt like talking to him, opening him up and delving into his past, would bring her back in some form.

  Even if that form was just memories. When you lose someone, you want to claw and grab at any threads connecting you to them. You’re scared to lose the sound of their voice, the warmth of their hand on your shoulder, the soft look in their eyes when they laugh at a joke you’ve told them. I’ve heard that losing someone is like losing the ability to make them happy, or losing a place for your love to go, that all your affection is stuck in your throat, trapped in your chest with no escape.

  There it burns, and burns, and burns. Until the pain is too much. Sometimes you go numb, and sometimes you numb yourself through drugs or booze or sex. And sometimes you put them behind you, letting the sharp edges of their memory fade in your mind. Time drips over them like water, blurring the places where they fit into your life, and smoothing over the holes in your heart that they left behind.

  Max’s death? It was still too raw. The tears in my heart too fresh, too jagged. Maybe that, more than anything else, was why I wanted Craig around. Being close to him felt like being close to her.

  “The first time I set eyes on Max, I thought I was going to be in her life forever.” Craig’s shoulders slumped. “The life doesn’t work out the way you think it will, does it?” A halfhearted smile ghosted across the Craig’s lips. The heaviness in him weighed me down. His feelings reached out and wrapped around me. Suddenly, I was drowning in his sadness on top of mine.

  “You’re going to need to give me more than that,” I said. “When did you know she was a phoenix, and why did you never tell her?”

  “Would you believe me if I said I was just trying to protect her?” He shrugged a shoulder. “We try to be angels, and we end up being monsters. She’d been through hell already, and the only thing that was keeping her safe was her ignorance.”

  What the hell did that mean? My eyes narrowed, and I inhaled a shaky breath.

  “Safe from what? What could her knowing, I mean, how could her knowing that put her in danger? Craig?” He was quiet as my questions rained down on him, and his eyes were soft with a feeling I didn’t want to understand. Whatever he knew was going to scare the shit out of me when he finally managed to get the words out. “Craig? Whatever you know, you may have thought you were keeping Max safe by not telling her… but you need to tell me. You owe that to me, that small thing at leas
t.”

  “You’re right. To this day, if she were alive, I’d do everything I could to ensure she wouldn’t know the truth. Her dad was some kind of monster, like yours, except it was baked into his DNA. He kept her like a pet, although she didn’t know that. I figured it out the first time I met him; I saw right through him. It runs in my blood, this fighting, this knowing what people really are. Demons, angels, shifters, magic…” He let out puffing breath that blew out his cheeks.

  I wouldn’t believe it, except that I’d lived that life, and was currently in it neck-deep.

  “You can see it on us.”

  “Like a mark,” he said, dipping his head in a nod. All over your skin, glowing from you, almost.” He lifted his fingers to the side of his neck, brushing over his pulse. “Right where they bit you-”

  My cheeks went red, and he smiled.

  “It’s… lemme tell you, how wolves take their mate? There’s nothing wrong with that. Sweetest declaration of love. I’m jealous I could’ve never done that to Max. Maybe if I’d been able to, I could’ve kept her safe-”

  “Let’s get back to the whole thing where her dad was a demon?” Because that was the real news of the day, and I tried to process that at the same time as moving Craig’s conversation away from my mates and my mate marks.

  Craig ran shaking fingers through his hair.

  “Yeah. I have no idea what his plans were, but he must’ve known what she was. It’s not like he birthed her. He had some bullshit story about losing her mom in a car crash-”

  “Right, she always said she grew up without her mom,” I murmured.

  “Except phoenixes don’t have mothers, not ones that stick around. I guess that was his sad sob story to get everyone to look the other way and not ask too many questions,” Craig replied, sounding bitter. “He was good to her, don’t get me wrong, but he hated me, and didn’t want her to have any friends close to her.”